Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
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Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
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We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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