Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize