Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize