I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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