she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize