So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize