Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize