Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Fuck appropriateness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I intend to get homeless drunk
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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