Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize