So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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