I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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