I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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