I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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