The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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