Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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