Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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