I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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