come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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