It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize