my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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