Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Randomize
