Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize