Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
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I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
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I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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