It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize