I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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