Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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