I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize