Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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