yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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