End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize