and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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