At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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