From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize