I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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