Texts From Last Night

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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.

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  (+44): I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no. http://tfl.nu/bvly
  Replies (2) Good night (451) Bad night (196) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door

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  (775): He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door http://tfl.nu/vv4w
  Replies (13) Good night (451) Bad night (1710)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  My hand turned me down

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  (303): My hand turned me down http://tfl.nu/yueq
  Replies (5) Good night (451) Bad night (2994) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.

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  (425): I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off. http://tfl.nu/u9dg
  Replies (3) Good night (451) Bad night (161) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Can I ask u a weird question?

  (1-509): View more from Washington

  Sure

  (509): View more from Washington

  do u have the hershy squirts too?

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  (509): Can I ask u a weird question? (1-509): Sure (509): do u have the hershy squirts too? http://tfl.nu/s8pz
  Replies (20) Good night (451) Bad night (3453)
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  (714): View more from California

  he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday

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  (714): he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday http://tfl.nu/odld
  Replies (18) Good night (451) Bad night (6200) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.

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  (860): I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love. http://tfl.nu/zgl1
  Replies (3) Good night (451) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.

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  (912): It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time. http://tfl.nu/lxl4
  Replies (4) Good night (450) Bad night (201) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard

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  (708): i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard http://tfl.nu/5qs2
  Replies (2) Good night (450) Bad night (389) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"

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  (712): Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me" http://tfl.nu/camp
  Replies (5) Good night (450) Bad night (813) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.

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  (607): Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun. http://tfl.nu/atlx
  Replies (6) Good night (450) Bad night (1713)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe

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  (919): just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe http://tfl.nu/vn8k
  Replies (5) Good night (450) Bad night (3014) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole

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  (865): I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole http://tfl.nu/7gdi
  Replies (7) Good night (450) Bad night (912) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.

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  (704): Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that. http://tfl.nu/31qd
  Replies (10) Good night (450) Bad night (4575)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?

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  (502): Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk? http://tfl.nu/ayp8
  Replies (2) Good night (450) Bad night (1452) Order T-Shirt