Texts From Last Night · January, 2011

Texts from January, 2011

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(716): View more from New York

He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.

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(716): He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies. http://tfl.nu/v70e

Replies (8) Good night (4011) Bad night (824) Order T-Shirt
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend

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(608): Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend http://tfl.nu/d6xp

Replies (5) Good night (4260) Bad night (909)
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(937): View more from Ohio

Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.

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(937): Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it. http://tfl.nu/m5np

Replies (9) Good night (3439) Bad night (902) Order T-Shirt
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(859): View more from Kentucky

My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.

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(859): My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over. http://tfl.nu/t1vw

Replies (9) Good night (602) Bad night (5528) Order T-Shirt
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(562): View more from California

Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas

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(562): Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas http://tfl.nu/zcne

Replies (7) Good night (2798) Bad night (742) Order T-Shirt
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(312): View more from Illinois

the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses

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(312): the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses http://tfl.nu/vxdn

Replies (4) Good night (4937) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt
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(630): View more from Illinois

i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.

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(630): i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it. http://tfl.nu/z8s5

Replies (6) Good night (980) Bad night (2952) Order T-Shirt
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(248): View more from Michigan

Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.

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(248): Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages. http://tfl.nu/po3d

Replies (12) Good night (3213) Bad night (659) Order T-Shirt
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(206): View more from Washington

My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town

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(206): My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town http://tfl.nu/phfq

Replies (20) Good night (5553) Bad night (1193) Order T-Shirt
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(720): View more from Colorado

He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.

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(720): He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were. http://tfl.nu/8g5z

Replies (7) Good night (728) Bad night (2295) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.

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(717): do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important. http://tfl.nu/a970

Replies (7) Good night (4021) Bad night (674) Order T-Shirt
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(828): View more from North Carolina

Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis

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(828): Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis http://tfl.nu/fz5v

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.

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(814): The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate. http://tfl.nu/mnoh

Replies (9) Good night (674) Bad night (3908)
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(773): View more from Illinois

I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs

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(773): I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs http://tfl.nu/g3cl

Replies (3) Good night (3219) Bad night (702)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall

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(440): Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall http://tfl.nu/to1l

Replies (4) Good night (1640) Bad night (1293) Order T-Shirt

Texts from January, 2011

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