me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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