4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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