If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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