who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
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Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
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I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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