Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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