I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
nut hugger
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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