And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
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I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
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I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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