if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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