OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize