He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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