My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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