Nicole vs. Life
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize