guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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