jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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